“Grace and mercy gives hope and strength to propel”
Hello, Responding To Life,
I am currently 21 years of age, the first born in a family of 5. I want to share a story of some of the things that I have been through up to date on the journey of transitioning from a boy to a man. In hope of the fact that it will serve as an inspiration to someone who may think that the Grace and mercy of the Lord do not work in our time because I am a living testimony of the fact that they do.
Growing up, life was good and my academic life was great and being the overall top student in school, I was blessed to attend High School in Kenyatta National High in Kenya yet as it was a blessing, my choices transformed this into what would sound like a curse instead. The streak of excellence did not follow me in High school, in fact, I deteriorated to a level of becoming a rebel of school rather than a lover. During my first year, I was confused and yet to comprehend the change. I was bullied to a point of depression which could be the reason for the change in personality, because the following year, my tantrums started. I rebelled against my teachers, friends and everyone else. Gradually I became the talk of school and not in a positive way. I led school strikes, instigated violence against other schools and as a result, fellow branches to our schools and partner schools.
Life took an irregular shape, but I seemed to love it. To some extent, it’s like I could get enough of it. Somewhat of my personal drug. I craved irresponsibility, yet the more I get, the more I wanted. On the 1st of October, I chose to celebrate my birthday a day early by participating in burning the dormitories for what now was the 10th time (Ironic isn’t it, that I was known for being notorious, yet no one could trace 9 school fires, back to the one person who was known for being a nuisance) As the saying goes: “The 3rd time does the trick” however in my case, the 10th did it, because someone noticed us and at midnight, as we had retired from causing havoc, we were woken by blows and kicks. Our school prefects all wanted a taste of one person. Anger being the root of all evil made my accomplices and I attempt to fight them off, which resulted in us being pinned down. We were then handcuffed by the police officers who arrived a few minutes later and escorted to the Administration Police offices because what we had done was a criminal act, which in our case, was a repeated offence.
On the dawn of my birthday, I woke up in a police cell. A young and very angry man. in the spirit of rebellion, I wanted to rebel against the police by trying to pick his gun, a friend calmed me down and warned me against signing my own death penalty on my birthday. With our background, we were prone to mistreatment and that was exactly the case. We were asked to push houses with our bare hands (Which is naturally impossible), dig trenches and clean the residence. in the night, we were handed over to the men in blue, who locked us in our cells. We slept in cold cells yet I only had a vest on. We stayed there for 5 days, with limited food and death threats. On the 6th day which seemed divine, we faced a judge in the court of law, where we pleaded innocent and my mother had to pay a bond of 30,000Kshs. I was a free man, with no school, but a pending case.
Where I live “Survival of the fittest” is the order of the day. I indulged in selling drugs and in a matter of weeks, I had a gun in my possession. My “gang” and I would attack people at night, but my mission was to aim and maybe shoot. “Every thief has 40 days” and I guess it was our 41st since we were caught by the police once again and as a result, I lost a friend and in anger, I wanted to attack the police.
By the grace of God, my uncle who is a police officer was present and he stopped me. He arrested me and took me home. I was later taken to an “Approved” school, placed under constant surveillance for about a year and by the time I shaped up, I was back to normal school, where I cleared high school back in 2016. The case also got dismissed due to lack of evidence.
Over the past year, I spent time, thinking about my life but depression still haunted me until I decided to shift my mentality as well and set my goals straight. I reformed and decided to keep to myself and God. Focus on myself and making myself better, so as to achieve my goals and from what I have witnessed, it has been working to my advantage.
God made me change, and if you re-read my story, you will notice that every single thing, worked for good, everything I tried, regardless of how long it took, failed because it was not in accordance to God’s will in my life. I love the Lord, I used to pray and I know He works miracles because I am a miracle. If only there was a way to give back to Him, more than what He has done for me. I hope my story inspires the life of someone and teach them a thing or two.
Dear readers, there are a lot of lessons to learn from this story.
- Do not let anger cloud your judgement. Only bad things happen at the height of your emotions. Remember, respond to life and do not react to life!
- Be sure to watch the signs of the Lord in your life!
- You are the author of your destiny and you should sit back and think about your options and the results before you make a decision!
- God’s grace and mercy give hope and strength to propel. You don’t give up because you realized that you made the wrong decision, no, you turn back to God for renewal of strength!
- No situation is permanent and everything (depression, anger, sadness e.t.c) placed in your life to limit or slow you down is just a chain that can and will be broken only if you don’t give up!
- It’s never too late to get back on track!
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